I said goodbye to Mum today. Phone call just after 9 a.m. to tell me that she had died about half an hour or so before.
I had planned to spend the day with Anita – brunch first, then sorting out some of Mum’s papers together. However, I cancelled the arrangement and went over to the hospital to talk to the doctors and nurses who had been looking after Mum instead.
There was not a lot to say, really – other than Mum had been unwell during the night and they had tried infusions of antibiotics, to counter the infection they had discovered in her blood, and paracetamol for pain relief.
The doctor I spoke to was very kind and said all the right things. So, too, did the sister in charge, so I came away, having stroked Mum’s forehead as a farewell, feeling sad, but not overwrought.
I am sad that Mum’s life has passed away, but relieved that her suffering has ceased. The last few weeks have not been nice for her at all, bless her.
Feeling the need to do something, I went across to the care home after I left the hospital and brought a few of Mum’s things back with me – but realised I hadn’t quite taken enough suitcases with me, having forgotten just how many things she had accumulated in the time she had been there. Another trip will be required, methinks.
Meanwhile, John had gone out for breakfast with Bryan this morning and had a good time. With the knowledge that Mum had passed on, John and Bryan were able to chew the cud a bit with regards to dealing with the fallout of such an occasion, which I think John found very helpful.
I spoke to Graham to let him know, and he promptly abandoned the evening out he’d been having to await more news. For once, the WhatsApp phone calls between us worked and so we were able to commiserate with each other, quite uninterrupted.
Naturally, the immediate family is upset. No matter how old, how cantankerous or how demanding Mum had been during her lifetime, we all loved her dearly and, in recent years, she had been positively angelic, so good memories have been generated. She was a massive presence in our lives, always.
This afternoon, Michael said he was going to take Chester for a walk. I too, had been thinking I’d take a walk to clear out the brain a bit, so we walked together to Paul’s and sat in his garden for a little while, talking it over. That was nice. Helpful.
As the day comes to a close, I suddenly realise how draining the emotional response to this situation is, and find I am weary. John, too, is weary, so we have sat companionably together on the sofa, with our memories, counting our blessings, happy just to be together and grateful for the family and friends drawing us in close. And so begins a new chapter….
Take care everyone. Tell those you love that you love them. God bless.







