Shielding: Day 132

I know it’s Sunday, but I didn’t want it to be. I didn’t want to do church on-line this morning and I didn’t want to chit-chat to everyone on a ‘Zoom’ coffee either. Although I won’t be physically going back into church when it opens at the beginning of August, I felt disabled today by the lack of ‘going’ to church. It’s the first time I have felt like that. I have been enjoying the on-line services and catching up with fellow congregants but no, not today.

Instead, I stubbornly stayed in bed for a while, scrolling social media and sighing over the ‘to mask’ or ‘not to mask’ debate. The brigade that is saying ‘I’m not wearing a mask because I don’t want to’ and those patting them on the head and saying ‘there, there, you don’t have to if you don’t like it’ is making me angry. I suppose it’s the mixed message that is confusing everyone, and so I’m getting angry with government ministers too, now. All humanity is here revealed, and I’m not too keen on seeing the raw selfishness on display.

However, once I’d chuntered to myself a bit, I hoiked myself out of bed and faced the day with positivity. No point dwelling on it all – after all, there’s not much I can do here still wrapped up in cotton wool is there?

I chose to keep on, keeping on, with a bit of cleaning – things I hadn’t done so conscientiously when Mum was living here. And, of course, there was a mountain of washing after I’d changed every bit of linen in the ‘The Blue Room’ yesterday, which led me on to tidying the linen cupboard as well. Once in a blue moon, do I do that job!

When you’re in a tidying phase, though, there’s always a distraction, isn’t there? For me, it was books. Spent a very pleasurable half hour or so browsing my bookshelves and sorting them out into ‘books still to read’ and ‘books to re-visit’. Particularly poetry books. And I couldn’t help but dip into them, so was pleasantly side-tracked for a bit.

Despite my un-Sunday feeling, I watched Songs of Praise while I sorted out papers that I’d brought from Mums. She had a stack of them (three bags full) lurking alongside her chair which came to light when we installed the new all-singing, all-dancing one. Everything, bar one or two little collections, could be ditched. Found a set of old theatre programmes which I’ve kept, and a wallet full of letters from Graham, circa 2008.

John, meanwhile, although there was the threat of rain, decided he was going to trim the hedge which has started to grow like a Triffid, threatening to overwhelm the patio and pond. He’s done a grand job so far, but there’s the brash to clear up now, which is always hard work. Perhaps we’ll have a go at that tomorrow.

Once the ol’ man had done his stint on the hedge he sat down for a while to recuperate, before venturing into the kitchen to make paleo bread rolls. Instead of the recipe we’d been using, which asked for a ton of cashew nuts which we hadn’t got, he used a couple of different recipes – and both have turned out remarkably well. Good man.

Despite my determination to be positive, the day still felt uncomfortable, so I suggested to John that we watch a film as we sat and ate our evening meal on our laps again. We opted for a film that was released last year, called ‘Bad Education’, with Hugh Jackman. It was based on a true story, so we thought it would be good. And, in truth, it wasn’t a bad film, but it was slow. It suited my mood, however, but I was thirsty for more. This time, we chose ‘The Hitman’s Bodyguard’ – an action-packed film with an awful lot of violence and bad language – which we both sort of enjoyed. It helped bash the demons, anyway. Yes, a couple of films and a bar of chocolate – great soothers.

And what of the outside world? A bit of cricket, at which we seem to be doing quite well in the third Test; confusion as to whether it’s safe to travel to Spain and the government not sure if its own advice is right or not, plus great hilarity over the Secretary of State for Transport actually having travelled to Spain; and, here’s a new one: obesity. That’s a new focus…. just wondering whether I am cynical, and it’s a ploy to make us take our eye off a properly important story? Take your pick, of course – there are so many….

Still in the outside world, the COVID-19 figures are significantly down on yesterday, thankfully, with 14 deaths in all settings today and 747 people confirmed as infected. The NHS report tells us that one death was reported in a hospital yesterday. Relief all round, perhaps.

With the un-Sunday feeling still lingering, I didn’t light my Candle of Hope this evening either. But there’s always hope, for tomorrow is another day, and who knows what excitement it might bring? God bless, keep cheerful and, when you’re out and about, keep masked…….. please.